Silence

Sorry to have been so silent of late but sometimes it is just what one needs to do. I don't know about anyone else but there are definitely times in my parenting life when things just get a little "too much" with too many things to be dealing with and my brain is so busy dealing with all the little and big details that I can't process or formulate my thoughts about what is happening.

Needless to say we've been busy with job searching, finishing up the preschool years, dealing with sensory integration issues and other behavioral stresses that may or may not naturally come from all of the above. And may I just say how completely messed up medical insurance/health care really is in this country! Throw out tons of dollars and get very little if any care for your expense... beyond frustrating.

Who knew that on top of being a parent/teacher/chef/maid, etc. we would also have to be detectives ever vigilant trying to piece together all the many symptoms and issues our kids display and decipher in which direction to then go to best support them in their growth and success? The next big reality show should be Parenting CSI (Childhood Scene Investigation). Are the tantrums just the developmental stage but a bit more intense due to Daddy being home all the time and Mommy's schedule being changed around? Is the fear of bugs just a blip on the radar screen, a bigger issue related to sensory process disorder or the onset of a potential obsessive disorder? How long do you wait to seek supports and then in which direction do you go?

I am hopeful that within a few months although we will have lots of changes (the start of kindergarten, moving upstairs to 3rd grade, Dad finally graduating), things will sort out a bit and we'll move forward with a plan toward some sort of success. For those parents, along with myself, in a bit of a current struggly patch, hang in there and keep looking for those clues. A wise internet associate recently sent me a reassuring note and quoted a psychologist who had this to say, "This is a process and it is proceeding. The answers are coming." Amen to that!

When Mother's Day Bites the Dust

Despite all the pretty cards and well wishes, sometimes Mother's Day just bites - big time!

Either no one ever talks about it (cause they hope the bad memory will just go away) or they are afraid they are the only one to have experienced less than happy mama moments on our big day.

I want to open this up for discussion... if you've had a less than stellar Mama's Day, will you share to free the rest of us from the delusion that it is always going to be flowers and happiness? What about when you'd love to take a family hike, but your oldest is JUST TOO AFRAID OF BUGS? Maybe it is just like wanting to have a secret admirer or someone send you a card or those coveted flowers on Valentine's Day when you are single but nothing comes. Maybe we should all expect less or should it be more?

For this Mama this year, so far my day started with sleeping in (that's good), followed by waking up to a whining, screaming, moaning boy who was just too hungry to handle his timeout (for what I don't even know). My husband had made my daily iced coffee (that's good). No other breakfast was to be had (that's bad). Best laid plans had gone off kilter as the kids refused to dress. They had made a few handmade Mama cards (sweet) but one kids gift was still hiding in our van forgotten and the other had been left at school -- handmade gifts from school are wonderful but somehow this year they just didn't make it into our home for the day of celebrating mamahood.

After the kids and Dad went out for awhile, emails ensued and they were off to get the groceries needed for a special Mama's dinner. While they managed as a team to get a gift of some kind (it is still hiding in the aforementioned van as the girl has been in meltdown mode). The grocery store run never happened 'cause the kids were too busy whining and throwing fits over what they were gonna get for themselves (makes a mother proud :-{). The girl miraculously managed to find a way out of her full-throttle tantrum mode, so we shall see what happens from here.

So there you have it. I bought myself a small gift ($5.00 shirt from the resale shop) and I'm considering taking the dog for a long walk, having some chocolate covered sunflower seeds and if things melt down further taking myself alone to a free movie (we've got some coupons we've been meaning to use). Happy Mama's Day Indeed!

Now if we think about it, no doubt our parental celebration days are just the same as the other biggies for the rest of the world... there are regular articles written on how to handle the letdown which often accompanies the winter holiday season - so why not Mother's or even Father's Day? And like every other holiday and its accompanying expectations, sometimes it's gonna feel just like a Hallmark Card commercial and sometimes more like a day in the bottom of Oscar the Grouch's trash can -- true to the nature of parenthood.

Here's hoping Mother's Day treated you well today ... and if not, remember that tomorrow is another day.

No Fair - Really!

For all of us oldest siblings (that's me above, oldest on the left) who love our younger sibs (that's my baby bro above, youngest on the right) but have always felt we were somehow treated less fairly... we finally have scientific proof (we were right all along)! Hmpf!

Now for those of us who have our own kids, are we doing the same thing to our young ones or have we somehow bucked this national trend? Is our oldest showing signs of being the more responsible one (if they have any brothers or sisters) or not? Mine currently is, but will it continue?

Were you a 1st born or a younger sib? How did it play out for you as a sibling and/or a parent?

Thankful Thursday

Thankful this Thursday for:

• May Day Flowers
• Great Teachers
• Iced coffee
• Hummingbirds
• A few good possible job leads
• Rescue Remedy and Calms Forte
• Great parents in our school communities
• The chance every new day represents to improve
• Ice cream
• A good camera